The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Christian

The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Christian

About 2,000 years before Steven Covey, Paul through the inspiration of the Holy Spirit recorded seven habits for highly effective Christian women.

Older women likewise are to … encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored (Titus 2:4-5).

Paul had more to say to the young women in Titus 2 than to any other group. Clearly, much depends on the young women! Here are seven qualities that will improve the life of every Christian woman, making her useful for service in God’s kingdom, and an example to the people around her. These principles never go out of date.

She Loves Her Husband. This seems obvious; even non-Christian women love their husbands, at least at first. But real love (John 14:12) is demonstrated in more challenging moments, when infatuation fades for a little while, or when he is annoying, disappointing, or unlovely. The world would say, “Give up!” and “File for divorce!” but older Christian women testify, “If you love him anyway, things likely will improve.” Real love has the other person’s best interests at heart. In fact, a wife who is uncompromising in her faith and who loves selflessly will have a huge impact on the kind of man her husband becomes.      

She Loves Her Children. It hardly seems necessary to remind a young woman to love her children. But how to best love children requires a lot of advice from older women, on topics like discipline, training, allowances, extra-curricular activities, TV shows, etc. Besides, every young mother experiences moments of dissatisfaction, convinced that she could receive a lot more fulfillment in some other line of work. Mothers, be assured, the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world! Your sphere of influence is the greatest entrusted to mankind. Even if you help supply income for your family, dedicate yourself fully to making your children the next generation of faithful Christians.

She is Sensible. The word sophronas refers to self-control and sober-minded restraint. This is not a specifically feminine challenge—Paul directs older men and young men to be sensible, too (Titus 2:2, 6). But a young woman will face many occasions where self-control is vital for her family and church—at the grocery store, posting on Facebook, in gossip situations. “The heart of her husband trusts in her” (Prov. 31:11).     

She is Pure. The word hagnas means “holy” and is a virtue for every Christian. Let all young marrieds see to it that immoralities would “not even be named among the church,” (Eph. 5:3). The kind of scandalous behavior we hear about in the news have no place among saints. There are wicked men prowling about seeking to take advantage (2 Tim. 3:6); be wise, set helpful rules, and give the Devil no opportunity.

She is a Worker at Home. A Christian woman is the proud manager of her household, seeing to it that her family is fed and home in order. “She is like merchant ships, she brings her food from afar” (Prov. 31:14). This is no easy task! Sylvia Porter in Home by Choice calculated that if all a young homemaker’s daily contributions were hired out, the worth would be around $50,000 in today’s dollars. Now, in this economy, many families need two incomes to simply survive. Besides, labor-saving devices allow anyone to toss clothes in the laundry or load the dishwasher. So, while many “non-traditional” arrangements are both functional and Scriptural, it is important that we find ways to prioritize our families. Don’t work two jobs just to make payments on new cars, while letting TikTok raise your kids!

She is Kind. Agathas is one of the fruits of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22) displayed by all Christians but is possible in a special way in the life of a young woman. She can give of her time to help other people in need and uplift the spirits of the downtrodden. She “extends her hand to the poor, and she stretches out her hand to the needy” (Prov. 31:20). She “opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue” (Prov. 31:26).

She is Subject to Her Husband. Paul gives a fuller explanation of submission in Ephesians 5:22-33. It does not indicate inferiority, it is not a threat, and it allows her to be relieved of burdens she’d rather not bear. It recognizes a family structure God has ordained. And for those in the community who are searching for a better way, it honorably advertises the word of God.

  —John Guzzetta